Thursday, October 28, 2010

Do I have game? You Damn Well Bet I Do!

Do I have game?  You Damn Well Bet I Do!

By Edward  J.  "Teddy" Stanton Jr.

Although an old timer myself,  I have always fancied myself an alpha wolf on the prowl who can still put the most virile of cubs in their place.  A recent email pointing out blogger Roissy's "Sixteen Commandments of Poon" confirms this:

I. Never say ‘I Love You’ first
II. Make her jealous
III. You shall make your mission, not your woman, your priority
IV. Don’t play by her rules
V. Adhere to the golden ratio
VI. Keep her guessing
VII. Always keep two in the kitty
VIII. Say you’re sorry only when absolutely necessary
IX. Connect with her emotions
X. Ignore her beauty
XI.  Be irrationally self-confident
XII.  Maximize your strengths, minimize your weaknesses
XIII. Err on the side of too much boldness, rather than too little
XIV. Fuck her good
XV. Maintain your state control
XVI.  Never be afraid to lose her

Heck, I've been intuitively following the above before the word 'game' was even in fashion.  Perhaps that's why I'm 51, have a wife (45) with seven legitimate children, and two girlfriends (ages 23 and 27).

Three Worthwhile Happy Hours

Three Worthwhile Happy Hours

By Edward  J.  "Teddy" Stanton Jr.

If looking to save a buck in these impoverished times, economize by visiting one of these three happy hours:

The Fou Frog happy hour (Tues. - Fri., 4:30 - 6:30) features discounted mussels, a meat and cheese plate, oysters, and a goat-cheese salad, among other things.  The inviting atmosphere created by the proprietors  makes for idle conversation and pleasant unwinding.   (Apparently Fou Frog will now offer lunch on Thursdays as well.)

The recently reopened downtown Parkville Piropos Grille (Tue. - Fri., 5 - 7, and Thur. all night) features discounted drinks, cocktail shrimp and tamales.  Eat, drink and enjoy the view overlooking historic Parkville. 

Webster House (Wed. - Sat., 4:30 - 6) features  $3 items on its happy hour menu, such as olives and truffle french fries, and includes many $7 cocktails like a Kir Royale, Gimlet or Old Fashioned.  Webster House may well have the most beautiful decor of any KC restaurant, including stately furniture and an august ambiance.  If you've never been, use this happy hour as an excuse to visit. 

The Kauffman Center for the Performing Arts is Ugly

The Kauffman Center for the Performing Arts is Hideous

By J. Randolph Swope

The ancients believed beauty resulted from balance, subtlety and proportion.  Examples of this are the Parthenon and Pantheon.  Later Europeans continued this tradition with the Gothic architecture and neoclassicism that still cover Europe.  Fast forward hundreds of years over subsequent architectural movements, and one witnesses a radical change, a celebration of functionality. Finally, enter postmodernist architecture, a subversion of the high for the low.   The impetus for this revolution in style (the subversion of the high for the low) can be traced back to a religious distrust of man-made beauty in Middle Eastern mysticism (inter alias causas), which has a long tradition of antagonism toward occidental high-brow standards (as noted Nietzsche).  Nowhere is this war against beauty more manifest than the Kauffman Center for the Performing Arts, a 285,000 square-foot monstrosity currently being erected in downtown Kansas City.   And to add insult to injury, instead of contracting  local firms (Kansas City is known for its engineering and architectural firms), an Israeli firm (Safdie Architects) heads the design team.

Any chance we could start a petition to demolish this eyesore?  We already have sufficient (and aesthetically pleasing) concert halls to host events.

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

2010 Kansas City Restaurant Rankings

2010 Restaurant Rankings of Greater Kansas City Area

 By KC Food Critic

(5 stars - 1 star.  It is difficult to make star list, so even a 1-star ranking is prestigious.

Only 5-star and 4-star restaurants are updated annually, so other listings may not be up to date.

Based on criteria of Michelin Restaurant Guide ranking, Mobil Traveler's Guide,  Forbes and Zagat.  Includes Kansas City proper and surrounding areas (Overland Park, KS, etc.).

Greater Kansas City Area

5-Star Restaurants

4-Star Restaurants
American Restaurant

3-Star Restaurants
Café Des Amis (Parkville)
Café Provence (Prairie Village)
Fou Frog
Michael Smith’s
Plaza III Steakhouse
Starker's Reserve
Tatsu's (Prairie Village)
Webster House

2-Star Restaurants
Avenues Bistro
Benton’s Steakhouse
Bristol - Downtown
Cafe Trio
Capital Grille
Classic Cup Cafe
Garozzo's Ristorante
Grand Street Café
Hotel Phillips’ 12 Baltimore
Hyatt-Regency’s Peppercorn Duck Club
Il Centro
Hereford House
InterContinental’s Oak Room
Lidia's Kansas City
Marina Grog & Galley (Lees Summit)
Morton’s Steakhouse
Pot Pie
Piropos (Parkville)
Raphael Hotel’s Chaz on the Plaza
Room 39
Ruth's Chris Steakhouse
Savoy Grill

1-Star Restaurants
Andre’s Tearoom
Cafe at Briarcliff
Cafe Sebastienne
Cascone's Italian Restaurant
Cafe Cedar
Extra Virgin
The Farmhouse
Fiorella's Jack Stack Barbecue
Golden Ox
Hardware Cafe (Liberty)
Hotel President’s Drum Room
J. Gilbert's Wood Fired Steaks (Overland Park)
Jess & Jim's Steak House
Lill’s on 17th
McCormick & Schmick's
Mike & Charlie’s
O'Dowd's Little Dublin
Paulo & Bill Restaurant (Shawnee)
Phoenix Piano Bar & Grill
R Bar
Raoul's Velvet Room (Overland Park)
Rheinland (Independence)
Ricco’s (Overland Park)
Salvatore's (Independence)
Stephenson's Apple Farm [closed?]
V's Italiano (Independence)
Yia Yia's Eurobistro (Overland Park)

Surrounding Cities

Excelsior Springs

1-Star Restaurants
Ventana Gourmet Grill

Platte City

1-Star Restaurants
Shields Manor Bistro

St. Joseph

1-Star Restaurants
36th Street Food & Drink Company            [Closed?]


3-Star Restaurants
Justus Drugstore


2-Star Restaurants
Avalon Cafe

1-Star Restaurants
America Bowman

KC Food Critic has a graduate degree from a top-tier university and has lived and worked in Europe numerous years.  Send comments and suggestions to: occfoodcritic[at]